Friday, January 14, 2005

January 14, 2005

Celebrity Sighting of the Day



sent to us by our *new* intern via slanderousminneapolis@gmail.com

Seen: at Wolves game vs. LA Lakers Monday night.
Former Gov. Jesse Ventura complete with new Hasidic Jew/pro wrestler facial hair and his son Tyrell. Big J sat twitching throughout. More important: Tyrell sat in a black suit and black shirt with his hair slicked back and dark Ray Bans or Oakleys or Wayfarers (some sort of white trash sunglasses). Either the Target Center is wicked bright, Tyrell has glaucoma, or Tyrell is actually Tom Cruise circa 87.




Well done! An excellent celebrity sighting with an excellent dose of wit. We're so proud of our new intern. And to think that we're paying him in Rye Crisps!

Happy Friday. E-mail weekend sightings here: slanderousminneapolis@gmail.com

Thursday, January 13, 2005

January 13, 2005

We would like to officially end our Make up an MLK Event Contest and declare the winner: NOBODY!

That's right. You are all big losers! Not one person sent us anything worth publishing on our blog. That's pretty bad, considering that we aren't a real news source (kind of like Fox and In Touch Magazine). What the hell were we smoking when we thought that you could handle this kind of responsibility? Oh yeah... Marijuana.



Perhaps this stern talking-to will shame you into working extra hard to spot Jeanette Trompeter. Seriously, she's been here for how long and not one of you has seen her pumping gas, canoodling with Randy Moss, or bitching that her morning latte' isn't exactly 160 degrees? For shame. A recap of the contest: spot Jeanette Trompeter, WCCO's newest anchor, tell us about it, and we'll give you a free prize. If you spot her doing something bitchy, the prize is better. Pictures of her are an extra bonus; it's as easy as that. This contest has no expiration date: first person to complete the assignment wins. Hop to it!

Correction:
We guess she's not here yet (thanks to the oh-so-brilliant commentator who posted the same thing twice!). We'll put the contest on-hold until March, but that doesn't make it any less important. We seriously need to get an intern to fact-check for us. Anybody interested?

Tuesday, January 11, 2005

January 12, 2005

Sighting of the Day



Here is a month-old celebrity sighting, brought to us via: slanderousminneapolis@gmail.com

A delayed celebrity sighting ... Dec. 22, Kinko's in Chanhassen. A very busy Paul Douglas, coming in to get his Christmas cards. He parked (what i think was) his Ferrari across three spaces out front. Seemed very busy, very preoccupied, and insulted the place I work -- a very large retailer whose HQ is right across from his studio. Says our buildings mess up the windflow or something like
that downtown.


A Ferrari?!? How 80's noveau-riche. We will always have a strong dislike for Paul Douglas based soley on his over-usage of the word "juicy" to describe humid weather during a brief period in the late 90's (we are not making this up). And in case you're wondering, yes, we hold grudges for stupid things. At least we don't drive a fucking Ferrari.

Hatin' on CJ

And you guys get upset that we consider the Watson’s slut a celebrity. CJ considers former KARE 11 anchor Paul Magers to be a legend. An excerpt:

“KARE-11 news director Tom Lindner is hoping to get promo footage of his new main guy, Frank Vascellaro, with the network's new main guy, Brian Williams, when the latter comes to town.

Williams will do the "NBC Nightly News" from St. Paul's Fitzgerald Theater on Thursday.

Because both replaced legends -- Paul Magers and Tom Brokaw, respectively --Vascellaro and Williams probably would have a lot to talk about. "Exactly," Lindner said. "I imagine they might have an interesting discussion. The network has asked us over the last year, 'How'd you guys replace a major anchor like Magers?' because obviously they are going through that."


Yes, we’re sure that NBC is calling up KARE 11 to get advice on how to replace legendary anchors. Next we’ll have the United Nations calling Channel 9 to ask how they ever got over their loss of Brian Z or George Bush calling Menard’s to ask how they are coping with the Menard’s guy’s retirement (actually, this one doesn’t seem that far off…).

Monday, January 10, 2005

January 11, 2005

BREAKING NEWS!!!



Here's something that CJ hasn't gotten her hands on:

An employee at an Uptown drycleaner has informed us that there is a note in the Robyne Robinson file that says they cannot accept her crotchless underwear!

We do not judge or wonder why Robyne owns crotchless underwear, but rather, why she has tried to have them drycleaned.

Media

* Thank GOD we can finally start wearing our fishing hat again. Our velvet Blossom hat didn't match our new poncho: [Star Tribune]



* Since Spike Lee will be here anyway, perhaps he can attend your MLK event: [Skyway News]

* And we thought that our upcoming wedding to Jeff Passolt would be so hard to plan! [Minneapolis/St Paul Magazine]

* WOAH!!! Nobody told us that the Pioneer Press mentioned US! [Pioneer Press]

January 10, 2005



There were no celebrity sightings in our inbox this morning, so there is little that we can report. We turned up little in the celebrity-spotting department ourselves. Although we did spend our day at the dog show yesterday, the only thing we could comment on are the interesting Casual Corner-era outfits on the handlers and the ugliest jailbait we’ve ever seen, but since these points have nothing to do with celebrities, we will not elaborate. Even CJ appears to be having a slow day.

So, in lieu of a bitchy post today, we will bid you a happy Monday. More sass tomorrow.